Missing Luke

After work Thursday, I left with my two girls and my mom and dad to go Tampa. The reason for the trip was to visit with family and go to my cousin's wedding. My husband, Luke, and Logan went to Georgia to visit his family. I enjoyed my trip to Tampa. I needed that time with my family. Marty enjoyed his trip because he needed time with his family. It has now been 5 days since I last saw Luke, and I am missing him terribly. The girls and I are back home and the boys should be coming in during the next few hours.

This is the longest time I have ever been away from Luke. I miss him. It has given me the opportunity to look at a lot of things by taking a step back. It has helped me gain strength.

The ESAC

I received a call from a lady with CARD (the Center for Autism and Related Disabilities) the other day. Luke's Early Steps (a local early intervention program) teacher had refered him to be evaluated by the lady. She is going to do the ESAC (the Early Screening for Autism and Communication Disorders) with him. She will come a couple of afternoons for a couple of hours. She will ask questions and go through the screening. I am really excited about this. I feel like we are moving in the right direction.

While Cerebral Palsy is a fitting diagnosis, I believe that Autism is what Luke really has. I have gotten so frustrated with his doctors. His pediatrician and his neurologist have children with autism, but they refuse to even talk with me about autism. His pediatrician had a hard time dealing with her son's autism diagnosis. To this day, she still thinks he has a syndrome, but really disagrees with the autism label. When I take Luke to see her, she dances around the autism subject. She will admit that he has "autistic behaviors", but will not diagnose him with autism. His neurologist will not even talk to me about it. So, if he has "autistic behaviors", wouldn't that be good enough for an autism diagnosis? Then, he would be able to received specialized services for the disability.

So, he turns two on August 21st this year. He has an appointment with his pediatrician and his neurologist. I am going to those appointments with guns blazing. We'll have the ESAC evaluation paperwork. I am also going to be sending in a video of Luke to both doctors. I am done dancing.

The following are the reasons I believe autism is the correct diagnosis-
1. He makes little to no eye contact.
2. He flaps
3. He self stems (ie; tapping toys against his teeth, tapping his teeth against hard surfaces)
4. He is developmentally delayed (which could mean other disabilities also)
5. He does not talk, yet he screams
6. He stems vocally (mmmm sounds)
7. He usually wants to be left alone (he does not seek out social interaction)
8. He likes fans and lights (really all things that are bright and spin)
9. He engages in repetitive play (pushes the same button hundreds of times, does the same thing over and over again, etc.)
10. He is hypotonic (low muscle tone)- This could be genetic. I am not Ms. Toned Muscle myself.

There are probably some other things, but come on! I mean, really! Autism should at least be on the table as a diagnosis.

Pure Happiness

I have gotten to spend most of the evening alone with Luke. It has been refreshing. Our afternoon together started off with a surprise-

I picked up Luke from Mimi and PapPaw. When I walked in the door, Luke was playing in his "gym". His "gym" is his room at Mimi and PapPaw's house. They have all his toys on the floor so he can play with them. I went into the livingroom, which is down the hall and across the kitchen from his gym. I talked to Mom and Dad for a while and then I thought I heard Luke's little voice in the hall. I got up to look... He was crawling towards me! He heard my voice and wanted me. When I picked him up he screamed and smiled. He got so excited.

So, I drove him home and fed him dinner. I have been on the floor with him for a while. I know not to force it with him. He doesn't like to be crowded. I just let him be, and he crawled up to me and snuggled my leg.

I celebrate every little victory. The little things are HUGE to me! Yeah Luke!!!!